The Grandmother Effect: What the Science Shows and What I’ve Seen at Home
For three months this Fall, I’ve had an unexpected front-row seat to one of the most fascinating theories in human evolution: the grandmother effect. As I’ve watched the growing bond between my four-year-old son and my mother (who was staying with us), I’ve come to learn about this idea not just academically, but viscerally. It’s a reminder of the deep, cross-generational threads that shape who we become. And, more importantly, how we thrive.
What Is the Grandmother Effect?
Scientists have long wondered why humans live so far beyond their reproductive years, a trait rare in the natural world. One compelling theory argues that grandmothers, specifically maternal grandmothers, play a crucial evolutionary role.
Known as the grandmother hypothesis, the idea suggests that the presence of a healthy, active grandmother increases a child’s chances of survival. Grandmothers support caregiving, provide protection and resources, and free parents to work or care for other children. In doing so, they improve family stability and overall community resilience.
In many ways, grandmothers are an ancient social safety net; one that continues to show its relevance today.
Matriarchal Strength: A Quiet but Powerful Force
Across human history, matriarchal and matrilineal societies have demonstrated remarkable stability and social cohesion. These cultures often benefit from:
Shared caregiving models
Stronger emotional and community bonds
Intergenerational knowledge transfer
Women’s leadership that anchors family and social systems
Even in societies that are not fully matriarchal, research consistently shows that maternal lines—grandmothers, mothers, daughters—form the backbone of family well-being. They create continuity. They hold the history. They nurture resilience.
Grandparents in Today’s Canadian Families
Canada’s family landscape is shifting. More families are stretched across work, childcare costs, rising living expenses, and the demands of multi-generational caregiving. In this environment, grandparents have re-emerged as essential contributors to family stability.
They are:
Helping raise children so parents can work
Supporting emotional and cultural identity
Providing a sense of grounding in an increasingly fast-paced world
Offering practical support—meals, rides, homework help, and connection
In many immigrant and multicultural households, this grandparental role is even more pronounced, reinforcing cultural values, language, and traditions.
My Personal Lens: Three Generations Under One Roof
Over the few months this Fall, I’ve been watching my son and my mother build a bond that is both heartwarming and instructive. At four years old, my son is at an age where every interaction shapes emotional patterns and cognitive development. And my mom has been patient, present, and ready to call his attention. She has become a stabilizing force in his life.
I've witnessed:
His confidence grow as she praises his imagination
His emotional regulation improve simply because she listens with the kind of unhurried presence modern parenting rarely allows
His cultural understanding deepen through her stories and perspectives
His independence flourish as she teaches encourages him with small skills with patience
For my mother, these months have been revitalizing. She is once again central: needed, valued, and woven into the daily fabric of our lives.
For me, it has been a profound reminder that family structure is not just logistical; it is strategic. Grandmothers create a ripple effect that strengthens every layer of the family system.
Why This Matters—Even for Leadership and Organizations
At Marawat Consulting, I talk about systems thinking, community resilience, and the power of relationships in shaping organizational success. The grandmother effect is a perfect parallel: strong, supportive structures create stronger outcomes.
Just as families thrive with intergenerational wisdom and support, organizations thrive when:
Knowledge is shared
Mentorship is valued
Experienced leaders stay engaged
Emotional intelligence guides decision-making
Everyone understands their role in the broader, long-term picture
Human longevity and success, at home or in business, does not happen by accident. It happens because of intentional connection.
In Appreciation of the Grandmothers Around Us
Whether biological, chosen, or symbolic, grandmothers are catalysts for resilience. They shape our children. They strengthen our communities.
And if this past Fall has shown me anything, it’s this:
The grandmother effect is not just a theory. It is a lived experience and a gift that impacts generations.